My latest Radical Mentoring group is tackling the topic of purpose. Specifically, life purpose statements. Identity asks, “Who am I?” Mission asks, “What do I want?” Purpose asks, “Why am I here?” The stock answer for Jesus-followers is “I’m here to glorify God” which is 100% true, but doesn’t speak to my unique purpose. Anne Lamott writes about how God made us because He thought we’d like it. Which makes sense if we believe that God knew us before we were ‘knit in our mother’s womb.’ But again, what do I do with that as a life purpose?
I’m throwing out an idea that I think helps each person define their unique purpose . . . I call it your ‘third word.’ My theory is that all Jesus-followers are called to love and serve. Those two are givens. The life purpose statement of every Jesus-follower begins “I, (your name here), exist to glorify God by loving and serving others.” And then you add your word after that. Mine is “challenge,” making my life purpose statement, “I, Regi Campbell, exist to glorify God by loving and serving others, and by challenging them to be all they can be and to give all of themselves to Jesus Christ.”
I don’t know how I got there years ago but I did and it’s served me well. I’ve been told that “challenge” is a combination of discernment and courage. Discernment leads me to form hypotheses about people and their motives. Courage enables me to lovingly confront them with what I see, sometimes leading them to different perspectives and decisions. Sometimes I just make them mad. But occasionally I’m sitting in a coffee shop with a guy who asks a question and my heart leaps . . . there it is . . . teed up for me. I challenge, he gets it, I walk away as high as a kite. Those don’t happen every day . . . I kiss a lot of frogs and do a lot of stuff that doesn’t directly fit my purpose in order to get to those cool moments, and that’s ok. Everybody has that. But knowing your unique wiring, gifts, talents, calling helps you say “yes” to things that set you up to add value and “no” to things that don’t leverage who you are and what you do best.
Now it’s your turn. What’s your third word? What’s the word that is unique to you? It’s what you do well naturally. It’s what you were wired to do from the beginning. I know guys who are “problem-solvers,” “planners” or “administrators.” When they’re doing that ‘thing’ . . . putting that third word to use, they’re ‘in the zone.’ They love it. They’re fulfilled.
If you need some help figuring out your third word, go through the list of potential third words below. Pick the top three to five that might fit for you. Then get it down to just one. If you struggle, hand the list to your wife and closest friends and have them pick the word that most describes what you are best wired for.
Once you’ve got it, ask God to affirm it. Ask Him to remind you of the times that unique third word added value to someone or something. Then . . . most importantly . . . ask Him to lead you into opportunities where your unique ability can be leveraged to build His Kingdom and bring Him glory. Find your third word and you’ll find meaning and fulfillment for a lifetime.
List of potential ‘third words’ . . .
*(Adapted from The Path: Creating Your Mission Purpose for Life and Work by Laurie Beth Jones)
Scripture: The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out. (Proverbs 20:5)
Mentor Tip: It’s easy to overlook the Purpose module as you build your mentoring track but I highly recommend it. We all know the two big questions: “Who are you?” and “What do you want?” But don’t ignore the other one: “Why are you here?”
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